Next issue is a creative issue! All submissions welcome, nay, encouraged! Please send a piece not exceeding 1000 words to thesemantic@gmail.com before Friday, April 3rd.
Faithful readers,
It struck me a little while ago that this, Issue 11, might be the last ‘regular’ Semantic issue to be published. Next issue, while no less special, will be ‘creative’ to finish up the school year. While this might not be the last Semantic ever, it probably will be. Hopefully I’ll be seeing you guys in a more, um, legitimate capacity next year. WINK.
There are too many people to thank. Obviously The Semantic couldn’t be without its writers. Connor, Casey, Katelyn, Andie (who is now in Korea, or will be when this is published), Patrick x2, Sarah, Carver, Jillian (who faithfully showed up to every meeting), Craig, and somewhere near 30 other people who have all contributed at some point.
Thank you, thank you Hafsah and Louise for photocopying. I fucking hate doing it and I never repaid you with baking. Hopefully these two lines, mass produced, will make you less resentful. Thanks Leo the Librarian. Thanks Lucas of the PP for hating that godawful name and for being a big help when I needed it. Not once did he ‘rat us out to the administration’ or whatever he’s been accused of.
And finally, thanks to whomever put the Semantic links all over the current student pages on the UPEI website. That was unexpected but pretty sweet.
Now: as far as my limited knowledge extends, there will be no deviant newspaper on campus next year. That is a problem! Here is a step-by-step set of instructions for
HOW TO CREATE ONE’S OWN ILLICIT NEWSPAPER
1. Have inexplicably well-read friends with chips on their shoulder (Arts students are best suited: almost all are bitter, some are well-read)
2. Get in with the librarians. They know pretty much everything that goes on in this place and love company! They also know the best backdated Cadres from which to draw inspiration.
3. Pick up a copy of Strunk and White’s Elements of Style to fake-reference in meetings so no one questions your editorial prowess. Pirate (or buy, I guess) a copy of Quark XPress
4. Be willing to invest a godawful amount of time and money into something that only few people will read. Remind yourself daily that some people get paid to do this - bitter helps productivity. Bitter. Helps. Productivity.
5. Print and distribute (with the help of lackies, with any luck) as many copies as possible on a semi-regular basis.
You’ll know you’ve made it when people start calling you the name of your paper. I’m willing to sell The Semantic, but only if you can prove to me a priori that you don’t completely suck. Beware: I’m a skeptic by nature.
Articles:
Student Union Election Coverage:
